Coping with Grief
The loss of a friend, a mom, a dad, a child, a family member, a loved one, a spouse, or a loyal loving pet can leave you feeling like you have actually lost a part of yourself, which is this indescribable feeling of pain in our hearts, bodies, and minds. You may even wonder, “How can I keep on going without my loved one?” Experiencing the physical pain of grief can feel like being pulled into a vaccum of time: you hurt and ache internally but you may also feel the pressure of “I have to keep doing all the things I have to, there seems to be no options. The world has no pause button”. So you try to hold onto the memories in your heart and remember how it felt to be around your loved one, their voice, their laugh, how they would look at you, their mannerisms. Just as your loved one is unique and your connection and memories you have of them, and with them, so is your grief…it is never the same as someone else’s. Your experience and how you navigate through life today without them physically here with you is just as unique. There is “no one size fits all” to your grief. However, you do not need to go through your grief alone. It is important to have support in sharing what you are experiencing as grief is a powerful emotion. There is no “end date” to our grief because our love and connection does not end. Our memories and connection with our loved one lives on in us and if we decide to share those memories with others we are also allowing our loved one to continue to live on in our sharing but this also helps us to connect with them. Sometimes it can feel like a weight resides in our bodies. Time may also feel both like it is racing forward but also never ending and we can lose track of time. It may feel hard to even get out of bed, let alone take care of ourselves.
Some tips for navigating through grief:
Talking to a supportive person is crucial: having more than one trusted person you can talk to so you are not alone with your experience and emotions.
Having self-compassion and being gentle with ourselves and doing one small thing thing daily like: having a warm, comforting, and fragrant tea and holding the mug and connecting to the feel in your hands with the scent of the tea. Or maybe it is listening to a playlist that you can really connect with. Maybe it is doing some gentle stretching. These are just suggestions, the main thing is to be kind to yourself in how you speak to yourself in your grief beginning with acts of being kind and gentle with yourself. Your one small act towards yourself of caring is unique so allow yourself to do what is right for you and remind yourself that getting into nature helps our nervous systems connect in a grounding (calming) way. It can feel both spacious and comforting at the same time.
Doing some form of movement. It gets our cardiovascular system stimulated which means we are getting oxygen to all parts of our body and brain which has multiple benefits both physically and mentally.
Taking a shower, which is something simple but can even so slightly shift our feeling
Colouring
Spending time with a pet or taking care of a plant or a garden
Eating healthy and drinking water, try to get a serving of protein (whether it is plant or animal you pick which fits best for you) into your meals as you can.
Reading, it can be any genre you enjoy
